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The Witcher 3: Fuck your Life Edition


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#1 Nightshade

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Posted 31 May 2015 - 03:09 PM

So, uh, this game is pretty good. You should play it if you have absolutely any interest in open world fantasy RPGs. It also has more content than I've maybe ever seen in a game. Be that from mission variety, storylines, voice acting, locations, etc.



#2 Merguson

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Posted 31 May 2015 - 04:11 PM

I can confirm this game is pretty good. 



#3 Kinetic

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Posted 31 May 2015 - 10:43 PM

Probably the best open world game I've ever played. Also, there is now an impossibly high standard for side quests in RPGs going forward. 



#4 Nightshade

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Posted 01 June 2015 - 03:36 AM

It's pretty amazing the shit they throw in sidequests, because a lot of it feels absolutely vital. One in particular that blew me away happened when I was simply mopping up a bunch of lower than my level sidequests before moving on to the main quest again (level 6 sidequest spoiler).

Spoiler


There's a lot and I mean a lot to chew on in the sidequests in this game. I really liked Dragon Age earlier this year, but as Tucker put it, "This game makes Dragon Age look like baby's first RPG."



#5 Kinetic

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Posted 01 June 2015 - 04:13 AM

It's pretty amazing the shit they throw in sidequests, because a lot of it feels absolutely vital. One in particular that blew me away happened when I was simply mopping up a bunch of lower than my level sidequests before moving on to the main quest again (level 6 sidequest spoiler).

Spoiler

That was a big WTF-holy-shit moment, and how it tied into the main story later felt so goddamn satisfying. Even the quests that boil down only to "find this big fucking monster and shank it" are given a ridiculous amount of care.


Edited by Kinetic, 01 June 2015 - 04:13 AM.


#6 JCTucker

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Posted 01 June 2015 - 09:39 AM

To put it in 90s JRPG terms:

 

If Witcher 3 is Final Fantasy VI, Dragon Age is FF: Mystic Quest.

 

And I freakin' loved Dragon Age, man.



#7 Nightshade

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Posted 01 June 2015 - 12:02 PM

Love doing this if you haven't tried:

SatisfiedRawGrayreefshark.gif

Adding to the fun is a fall damage penalty that's so brutal it might as well be the final boss of the game.



#8 Kinetic

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Posted 01 June 2015 - 08:01 PM

The Witcher 3 is probably the best snowboarding game on the market right now.



#9 Drew

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Posted 21 June 2015 - 09:33 PM

I bought this. Tips for starting out? I'm just doing side quests right now, should I ignore them for now or what? Been wandering pretty aimlessly - really like how you're kinda just pushed out on your own to do what you will. I dig it, so far. Do swords have more stats than just damage (i.e., speed/weight) or should I just toss an old blade when I get one with more damage?

Edited by Drew, 21 June 2015 - 09:35 PM.


#10 Blaze

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Posted 21 June 2015 - 11:49 PM

I bought this. Tips for starting out? I'm just doing side quests right now, should I ignore them for now or what? Been wandering pretty aimlessly - really like how you're kinda just pushed out on your own to do what you will. I dig it, so far. Do swords have more stats than just damage (i.e., speed/weight) or should I just toss an old blade when I get one with more damage?


The tutorial/glossary section will answer a lot of questions you may have. You should probably complete any side quests (that are less than or equal to the level of the current story quest) first. Swords have bonuses like "% chance to stagger" and "% chance to burn" -- those can be more beneficial than just raw damage. Ursine armor looks the best. You can romance whoever you want, but the correct answer is Triss. Play Gwent.

#11 Kinetic

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 04:00 AM

I bought this. Tips for starting out? I'm just doing side quests right now, should I ignore them for now or what? Been wandering pretty aimlessly - really like how you're kinda just pushed out on your own to do what you will. I dig it, so far. Do swords have more stats than just damage (i.e., speed/weight) or should I just toss an old blade when I get one with more damage?

 

1. Accept that Roach, your horse, is a fucking idiot and should be loved despite her mental handicaps.

 

2. Definitely pay attention to the bonuses on swords. A sword that has a good chance (10% or higher I'd say) to cause bleeding/poison/burning or has a really high critical hit bonus is worth a lot more than a few measly damage points. Bleeding is best for monsters (silver sword), burning is best for humans and non-monster beasts like wolves, dogs, and bears (steel sword). I don't know why this is or if it's just in my head, but it's been my experience.

 

3. Wolven armor (free DLC) looks the best once upgraded fully, Ursine and Feline armors look really cool too though.

 

4. Speaking of which, get those Witcher school armors/weapons as soon as you're at the right level to wear them. They're often the best stuff you can equip at that level and each set can be upgraded three times.

 

5. The correct answer for romance is Yennefer, Blaze doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about.

 

6. Play Gwent. Play Gwent a lot.

 

7. When you're approached by plot-centric characters and given a side quest that directly involves them, do that side quest as soon as you're able to. Progressing too far into the plot and ignoring them can cause them to auto fail, and then you're gonna have a bad time.

 

8. If you have time, read some of the in-game books and notes. They flesh out a decent amount of the world beyond the Witcher games.

 

9. Buy better saddlebags whenever you can. That's what determines how much weight you can carry.


Edited by Kinetic, 22 June 2015 - 04:05 AM.


#12 Blaze

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 10:17 AM

5. The correct answer for romance is Yennefer, Blaze doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about.


I will fight you on this, mother fucker. I dare you to make an argument for why Yennefer is better for Geralt than Triss.

#13 Drew

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 11:08 AM

Already intimately familiar with Roach's stupidity. So much so that I find myself walking a lot of the time when exploring off the road... Thanks for the tips - especially about weapons, I love you nerds.

 

My first couple games of Gwent when sideways pretty quick, but I think I'm starting to get the hang of it. Great distraction.

 

Is there any indicator that any particular side quest is more important than the others? Or will it be pretty obvious?



#14 JCTucker

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 01:47 PM

I've got a steel sword that's like 54% critical damage bonus, 5% increase in crit chance, and 35% chance to cause bleeding.  With 3 upgrade slots.  There are swords that are about 20% higher in damage, but I'm not giving that sword up.



#15 Kinetic

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 01:52 PM

I will fight you on this, mother fucker. I dare you to make an argument for why Yennefer is better for Geralt than Triss.


Yennefer is the objectively hotter, historical love interest.

Triss is a ginger bitch who took advantage of Geralt's amnesia in the first two games to steal him away.

#16 Blaze

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 03:39 PM

Yennefer is the objectively hotter, historical love interest.

Triss is a ginger bitch who took advantage of Geralt's amnesia in the first two games to steal him away.


I'm spoiler tagging. Go away, Drew.

Spoiler


#17 Kinetic

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 04:39 PM

Yennefer's hotter and is cool with fucking on a stuffed unicorn. Therefore she is better.

Triss isn't as hot, and her name doesn't sound as cool. So she's not as good.

Edited by Kinetic, 22 June 2015 - 04:42 PM.


#18 Nightshade

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 04:51 PM

Triss is my waifu for lifu.

#19 Kinetic

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 05:29 PM

Real wordz

 

Spoiler



#20 Blaze

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Posted 22 June 2015 - 07:06 PM

Real wordz
 

Spoiler


Spoiler



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